Why do we give our lives in the hands of fortunetellers

For what reason successful, sane people suddenly go to fortunetellers and psychics? We seem to look for the one who will decide for us, as in childhood, when adults decided everything. But we are now not children. Where does the idea come from that it is better to give responsibility for our lives to those who “know everything better than us”?

Now Alexander is 60 years old. Once, still a boy, he sat with his sister on the fence and gnawing a juicy apple. That day he remembers in detail, even what they were both dressed in. The elder walked along the way and turned to their house. Parents reacted to the traveler with respect and Petit.

The conversation was short enough. The old man said that the boy would swim around the sea (and it was a deaf Siberian village, which made doubts) that he would marry early, and to the dissenter, and that he would remain a widow. The girl was predicted a good future: a strong family, prosperity and many children.

The boy grew up and went to study in a large city, where his specialty “accidentally” was connected with the sea. He got married early, a girl from a different denomination. And widowed. Then he got married again. And again widowed.

The sister, on the other hand, went through her way in a completely different way: a short marriage is not for love, divorce, one child, loneliness for life.

Mental infection

Since childhood, we are used to believing in Santa Claus, in magical stories, in miracles.

“Children absorb the parental messages and attitudes unconditionally, adopting the pictures of the world of those who surround them,” explains the psychologist Anna Statsenko, “the child is growing. Faced with various life situations, he, from his children’s part, wants someone to decide: what to do, what exactly needs to be done, as it will be safer. If there is no person surrounded by the opinion of which the children’s part would completely trust, the search begins “.

And then those who always and know everything in advance, confidently predicting the future, come into business. All those whom we endow the status of a significant and authoritative person.

“They go to them in order to relieve themselves of responsibility, tension from fear of making a mistake,” the psychologist continues. -In order for someone else to choose and said how and what to do to reduce the level of anxiety, get positive reinforcement. And so that a significant adult reassures: “Do not be afraid, everything will be fine”.

Criticality at this moment is reduced. Information is accepted on faith. And there is a chance that a person will be “mentally infected”. Moreover, the introduction of an alien program sometimes occurs completely unnoticed, at an unconscious level. “.

We communicate with the help of words, each of which carries a certain encoding, a clear and hidden message, Anna Statsenko believes:

“The information falls on both the level of consciousness and the unconscious. Consciousness can devalue this information, but at the same time the unconscious will isolate the format and fragment from the text that can be accepted through the prism of personal experience and family-Roal history. And then the search for strategies for the implementation of the information received begins. There is a great danger that in the future a person will act not from his free will, but from the restrictions received through the message. “.

How quickly it takes root and whether the Virus message will take root depends on whether there is a fertile soil in our unconscious for such information. And then the virus will hook for fears, fears, personal restrictions and beliefs, says Anna Statsenko.

How the life of these people would unfold without limiting predictions? At what point do we abandon our path, of the true choice due to prediction? When trust was lost, to your highest “I”?

Let’s try to figure out and develop an antidote in 5 steps.

Antidote from the virus

Step one: Learn to rely on a position when interacting with someone: I am an adult and another-an adult. To do this, you need to explore your adult part.

“An adult state is the one in which a person realizes and sensibly evaluates the risks of any of his actions, is ready to take responsibility for what is happening in his life,” explains Anna Statsenko. – At the same time, he forms various strategies in a particular situation.

In this state, a person determines what is illusory for him, where he wants to build an air castle. But he observes it, as it were, from the side of full departure in these illusions or in parental prohibitions.

To explore my adult part – this means to study whether I can develop strategies on my own, take responsibility for what is happening on myself, be in contact with my fears and other feelings, allow myself to live.

Can I look at another, without overtaking his importance, but without devaluing, from the position I am an adult and the other, an adult. Can I distinguish my illusions from reality “.

Step two: Learn to be critical of the received information from the outside. Critically – this is not depreciating, not derogatory, but as one of the hypotheses explaining the events taking place.

We are ready to accept information from others, but we treat it as one of the theories, calmly rejecting it if it does not withstand criticism.

Step third: To realize whether in my request to another an unconscious desire to relieve yourself of responsibility. If so, then return yourself to an adult position

.

Step fourth: realize what need I satisfy, turning to another. Is the candidate really chosen to satisfy this need.

Step Five: learn to determine the moment of implementation of the virus. At the level of state change. For example, you just laughed and were full of energy, but after a conversation with a colleague, longing fell, disbelief in yourself. What happened? Is it my condition or state of a colleague that was transmitted to me? Why do I need it? Were there any phrases in the conversation that sounded in a special way?

Remaining in contact with our adult, we can protect both the inner child and ourselves from self -explosive prophecies and other possible dangers of this kind.